I met Jennifer Parker as a peer therapist about 15 years ago at Harmonia: Madison Center for Psychotherapy. Shortly after meeting Jennifer she joined a spiritual journaling class of mine. “Julie encouraged me to take my writing intention seriously and to ‘follow my calling,’ and to believe I had something to share.”  Jennifer then attended my book proposal class later to join a writing support circle of mine. “After years of perseverance and growth as a writer, I published my book, Coercive Relationships: Find the Answers You Seek, in 2021.” 
 
Now here in 2022, I re-opened my in-person practice from a room set aside in my home where I see a few clients a week. (I lost my space in Prairie du Sac in the first year of the pandemic. And have been engaged in live video therapy and mentoring). Two of my first clients to arrive at my door were in the most Coercive, psychologically abusive relationships I have encountered in my 40 years of practice. The first and most critical challenge was to help them leave their relationships. After about a month of weekly sessions, I suggested they get Jennifer’s book. The next week they came back, having finished the book.
 
The following week they both exited their decades-long toxic relationships.
 
So many singular (and even small) acts led to this.
 
These singular choices to attend a class, write our story, read a book, or try therapy, make for the big, necessary changes in our personal and collective lives. Our singular acts, made up of many small acts of courage and vulnerabilities, lead to what appears to be a miraculous encounter or transformational change in ourselves or others.  In reality the miraculous in our lives is a by-product of our singular acts.
 
These singular, often small acts carry us across the thresholds of our lives. 
 
There are no singular acts really because our small actions impact countless others.
 
When someone leaves a toxic relationship this singular act has a profound and positive effect on everyone they encounter. 
 
Acts of courage can be even more simple and mundane than ending a toxic relationship as opportunities within our everyday lives.  Trying things out, like attending an Al Anon meeting or checking out colleges on line in pursuit of an old dream that seemed dead. Writing a poem. Calling a friend. These singular acts are at the root are simple, at the crown, transformational.  
 
 One choice. One Act. One encounter. One book. One consideration. One small change of attitude. One step.
 
This is all we need to focus on, these singular (in the moment) acts. This is enough to feel better in our skin, to recalibrate our lives toward the good, to be free.
 
​Through these small, singular acts we are leaders.
 
Listen to this 6 minute Ted Talk: Everyday Leadership by Drew Dudley.
 
"Hope is holding a creative tension between what is and what could and should be, each day doing something to narrow the distance between the two." —Parker J. Palmer